AT PARTY HEADQUATERS: Our party has decided to nominate him to run for the election. Now the question you might be asking yourself is 'why him?' or 'why a statue?', well we all know what happened to our last 4 candidates (For those who don't know...kisi ne udaah diya un logo ko). Ess baar aesa na hoga or naa hum hone denge!
There are many reasons that makes him a great candidate. One of the main reason for selecting him is because he's 100% indestructible. He has been tested under all conditions and situations. He has been been made with special metal found on planet pandora, called unobtanium. I know this has cost us some money, but we'll get it back as soon as our party wins the election.
Second, he has no emotions. However, he has been installed with small microscopic tubes near his eyes, so if there is a need we can run water thew it making it seem like he's crying. We can use this to our advantage and get more spiritual voters.
Also, we have made ten other non-expensive life size copies of him, which will be used to promote our party in different areas of the country. They all have pre-recorded speeches that are sure to fire up the public and get us the votes.
Do not worry loyal followers, he'll vote as the party want him to vote.
Before we leave this meeting, I need to discuss one more thing that we are working very hard to correct. At present, this candidate does not have any rape, murder, bribery, or corruption charges against him, which is not good. Our people expect more, therefore we are working night and day to change this. There will be soon number of FRI filed against him, but rest assure he will not be convicted any of this. This can only help us.